It can cause devastation and people often feel as if their world has come crashing down around them.
They may feel stupid that they didn’t see it coming, they have no idea what went wrong or what they did to bring it about.
If this is you then STOP right there.
Firstly and foremost, it’s not your fault. You did nothing to cause it. Divorce is a simple case of one party to the marriage wanting a different future to what you both wanted at the outset of your marriage.
There are, however, practical things you can do to help you stabilise your emotions and start to survive the ordeal of separation that you now face
Don’t bury your head in the sand and pretend it is not happening. Face the problem head on;
Make an effort with your appearance each morning. This will make you feel better about yourself and also show a strength of character to your children that will make them feel less scared for their own future;
Act with confidence even though you feel you are falling apart inside. If you act confident over time you will feel confident and you will gather the strength to plan for a future without your partner;
Get the support of a divorce coach to help you recover and rebuild your confidence and self-esteem;
Get good advice from a family law specialist so you know what your rights are;
Keep busy and stick to your usual routine. This will help you keep a sense of normality in turbulent times;
Start doing things just for you;
Avoid confrontation with your partner. Give them a wide berth until you can trust yourself to remain calm and reasoned in your responses and reactions towards them;
Stop reading or posting on social media;
Don’t plead or beg your partner to stay with you;
Do not call or text your partner unless it concerns the children and is necessary. Don’t engineer reasons to call or text them;
Do not ask or engineer a situation where your children or friends and family feel they need to take sides;
AND most of all BELIEVE IN YOURSELF